Peace of Mind is All I Want...: March 2009

Peace of Mind is All I Want...

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

I am a fraud.

This is/was an infertility blog that morphed into a sporadic mama blog then was pseudo-morphing into a secondary infertility blog. Except that I'm pregnant.

Yep. Knocked up. With child. Bun in the oven. Preggers.

We had a plan. We were going to give it a try au natural until June/Julyish. An internet friend sent her leftover OPKs. I was going to start using them next cycle. I've had regular periods since January-ish and almost clockwork cycles. CM a flowing, if you know what I mean. I never, ever thought that it would be this easy. I'm greatful but shocked. Worried but thrilled. Scared shitless but excited.

The timing isn't ideal. One of my best friends just had a failed IVF cycle. I'm not looking forward to telling her. #2 will be due about a month before Christmas and 2 months before my daughter's 2nd birthday. I was looking forward to traveling to see my parents for Christmas this year but I'm not sure that will happen. I've only been at my new job for 2 months and I really, really like it here. I'm part time so there's no FMLA or maternity leave. I have no idea how they'll take the news when I tell them but I would really like to continue to work here and I hope we can work something out.

Todd and I both laughed when I got the results. Not the joyous, tender laughter like the first time but more "what the fuckityfuck?!" laughter of disbelief. Not that we aren't thrilled, of course! It's just so, so unexpected. Unplanned. But definitely not unwanted.

Two under two. Holy hell.


Friday, March 20, 2009

Happy 14 months, little girl!

What a great week we're having! The weather has been gorgeous! We've been able to break out part of Audrey's summer wardrobe.

My work schedule is working out to be a dream! 4 day weekends every week give us an extra 2 days to play together. This week we went to the eye doctor on Monday where everything was pronounced just fine! What a relief.

(sorry for the crappy picture - she's fast these days!)

We spent Tuesday morning (St. Patrick's Day) enjoying a concert in the lobby at the Four Seasons. South by Southwest is in town this week and there's live music everywhere. Audrey had a blast dancing around everywhere. Her cute little outfit was made just for her by her grandma.

Here she is attempting to sneak out of the house. Tallulah looks on hopefully.

We're heading home to Pittsburgh in a week, just the two of us. I'll apologize to any fellow passengers in advance because I don't think this is going to be an easy trip! Now that Audrey is fully mobile sitting on my lap isn't her favorite thing to do. She's fiesty, spunky and doesn't hold back what she's feeling. While I love all of those qualities in her it does occasionally make for some challenging times.

She's really cutting back on nursing now. She's totally cut out her first think in the morning and right when we get home from daycare sessions. She barely nurses at lunch anymore though I do still continue to go and visit with her. I think I will probably start to eliminate that - she's always having fun with her friends and I think I'm starting to cramp her style. She's taken to soy milk like it's water. I didn't see that coming! It took a while for her to actually attempt to drink it but now that she has, watch out! Next step: eliminate the bottles that we struggled so long to get her to take. She's always through curve balls at us.

As always, I feel very blessed to have this little girl in my life. She makes me laugh every single day. I'm a better person because of her. My love.

Thursday, March 05, 2009

More developmental stuff

On walking: she's totally doing it! Not 100% but more and more every single day. Her first steps were on Feb. 1 and she took about 8 of them. Caught me (and her) totally by surprise. Apparently it was too overwhelming because there were no more steps until 2/16. Crawling is still much faster, especially when chasing the dog but she's walking every single day now, on all kids of surfaces. Nana is going to freak out when she sees this action :-)

Sleeping is getting better too (knock on wood). We're still nursing in the glider before bedtime. She'll finish and actually point to the crib to tell me that she's ready to go to sleep. She did that at bedtime and again after she woke at 12:30 AM. Sweet!

In some not so sweet news, we're heading to the eye doctor in a couple of weeks. I suspect that she has a lazy eye based on some photos I took. We post daily pictures on another blog of sorts for our families to keep up with us. I noticed that her eyes are kind of wonky in several of the pictures I've captioned with comments about how tired she was at that time. I've always had crummy vision/issues with my left eye so it's not a total shock but I was hoping she got her daddy's 20/20. I'm optimistic because we caught this SO early. I'm pretty proud of myself for knowing my girlie so well that I spotted it so soon. Please keep your fingers crossed that we get good news from the doctor.

In TTC news, I'm going to give the old OPKs a shot this cycle. If I can remember how the timing works with those suckers. I'm not ready for RE appointments/meds yet so I'm trying to keep this low key for a few cycles.