Gross

Lost part of my mucus plug today. I forgot how gross the endish of pregnancy is. Between the 'roids, discharge, plug and unkempt hair...gag.

I took a four hour nap today while my husband took my child out of the house. They got haircuts, shiny purple shoes, a "bankie" for the new guy once he gets here and some chicken fingers. I would be jealous but come on. Four hours of sleep!

Count down

Am I the only one that feels like crawling into a hole toward the end of a pregnancy? I can't help but completely withdraw - from friends, message boards, blogs, etc. I don't get it.

We're down to the final weeks of being a family of three. I'm not going to lie - I'm terrified. I had some rough contractions on Friday that made me dread the thought of going into labor again (but they did get my rear end in gear and I actually got a bag packed to go to the birth center). Obviously nothing came of it or this would be a whole different post but it was definitely a reality check.

As far as pregnancy goes, things are fine. There's a little protein spilling into my urine but my blood pressure is just fine so no one is worried.

Audrey is fantastic, as usual. She's back into the habit of waking up overnight again - usually just once. She says she's hungry - go figure. She's been a crazy girl with food lately. She'll either eat her weight in whatever it is that's being served or there isn't a morsel that crosses her lips. Typical toddler stuff, right?

I think we have just about everything we need for now for the new guy. I'll have to get some bottle and pump parts eventually but we're covered as far as bringing him home goes. My sister flies in on Thanksgiving to spend a few days with us in case we need overnight Audrey care then my MIL comes in after that. We have a couple of back up plans just in case but I'm hoping this kiddo will stay put for another week or so.

Exciting times. Not as exciting as they're going to get, I'm sure.

Getting closer

It's unfathomable to me how quickly time is passing. We're just about at the end of October which means that we're going to be a family of four within the next 6 weeks. I think I'm officially 36 weeks along give or take a few days but the idea that I could have a new baby NEXT MONTH is crazy.

Still on our to do list:
Attempt to put the infant seat in my car to see if we can hold off a few more months on getting the van

Assemble crib and figure out where in the heck to put it. Buy mattress for crib.

Pack bag for birth center.

Take Bradley refresher class (scheduled for next weekend).

Find breast pump/bag/cords/etc. Order replacement parts.

Wrap up loose ends at work.

Not too much to do, luckily. We have diapers. I have breasts. Everything else is gravy, right?

I had a midwife appointment on Weds. and we discovered that this guy is sunny side up. That certainly explains the back pain I've been having. I have some exercises to help encourage him to flip over - we'll see! I'm just glad he's head down. I'm on the weekly plan as far as appointments go now. There are still 2 midwives I haven't met - I've really liked everyone so far, hopefully these too as well. I got a little mushy at my last appointment talking about labor and nursing a newborn. I'm really looking forward to getting to know this baby.

Best day ever (well, in a while)

Today was wonderful. And no just because I redeemed my Mother's Day spa gift certificate.

Audrey woke twice last night and was so super snuggley that it was a pleasure to rock her back to sleep. She slept in until after 8 (a very rare occurance) and was still snuggley. We cuddled in bed while she drank her smoothie and watched "a monkey show" until it was time to get dressed. We headed back up to her room and danced to her "nudik" (music) and played silly games. She wanted her pillows out of her crib so we could play night night. I love how she tells me to pit my head down then "wake up more, mama". She started to tell me sweet dreams - I burst into tears, of course. We had a blast playing. I love when Miss A is so chatty and sweet. It was a perfect morning.

I left for my masssage and had a wonderful time being pampered. I stopped for some dinner (alone!) on my way home. Heavenly!

As I pulled into our driveway I was Audrey and Todd playing across the street. Audrey caught sight of me and RAN across the street to see me. My heart melted on the spot. I pushed her in her swing and we played a bit outside. We went back in and shared a banana (I sliced it for her but she wanted to share) and got ready for her bath. She's just so SWEET, I can hardly take it. After our usual pj and night night routine I rocked her for a bit and sang together. Her latest fave is rock a bye baby - we'd get to the end and she'd say "rockababy again!". Sigh. I put her in her crib her and rolled onto her belly and told me sweet dreams again. I could hear her playing on the monitor until she drifted off to sleep.

Perfection.

Status quo

There isn't really anything new to report. I'm just about 34 weeks. We bought tiny diapers for the new guy. Audrey is fantastic despite reminding us what having a newborn in the house overnight is like. She's been skipping her nap the past 4 days and waking up several times at night. Poor kid is finally getting her canines/insisors, I imagine that has a lot to do with it.

I had a midwife appointment yesterday who assured me that my emotions surrounding baby #2 and the guilt I'm feeling are completely normal. No need for chemical assistance. She suggested that I take better care of myself and do something to recharge. Luckily, I have a gift card to a local dayspa that I received for Mother's Day and I plan to do just that on Saturday :-) Massage, facial, mani/pedi and some waxing. Can't wait!

Head down!

Woohoo! Little Man is officially head down!

I had a midwife appointment this morning - all is well. My glucose results are perfect, BP is right on and baby's heartbeat is in the 160s. The midwife felt for his position and was almost certain he was heading in the right direction but she confirmed with a quickie sonogram to be on the safe side and he's right where he's supposed to be. What a relief! Even if he flips again there's a greater chance of coaxing a baby back into the right position that has already BTDT.

I'm still coughing a bunch. Yuck. Hopefully by the end of the week I'll be back to normal.

Sick, sick, sick

There's been a cloud hanging over our household the past weekish. First Audrey caught it - runny nose, low grade fever, coughing, no appetite. Then she felt better but passed it onto me. Same symptoms, minus the fever with a little more coughing. I'm coming out of the clouds now but am still feeling like I've been hit by a bus. Luckily daycare was able to take Audrey Monday and Tuesday (our usual off days) and I was able to get some sleep otherwise I don't know how I'd be feeling right now! I'm still hoping Todd avoids catching this this. He's the biggest sissy ever when he has a cold. The temptation to off him might prove to be too strong :-P

Aside from that, things are....interesting. Audrey has been moodier than usual, most likely due to her cold. She's been all about the drama of everything, especially between 5 - 6 PM and right before bedtime. Her food intake hasn't been great and what we have been feeding her hasn't been as balanced as it could be. I'm looking forward to a trip to the grocery store on Sunday to restock the fridge/pantry and to see how things go after that.

I'm becoming more and more aware of how life is going to change in a few months. My heart hurts when I think about our morning routine changing. I selfishly want to keep everything just the way it is and fit baby boy into an existing situation but I'm pretty sure that's just not realistic.

I'm terrified, I really am. What if Audrey thinks I don't love her as much anymore. Am I cheating the baby out of having my fill attention the way Audrey did? Is this a horrible mistake? I hate to borrow trouble but these are the things that keep me awake at night. I feel him moving and pressing against my stomach and I worry about how this one little baby is going to set into a motion a crazy chain of events.