Peace of Mind is All I Want...: #2

Peace of Mind is All I Want...

Wednesday, June 11, 2008


Last night Todd and I had The Talk about having another baby. Back before I knew how hard it would be to get pregnant I dreamed of have 2 kids pretty close in age. Now that I know what's involved with us getting pregnant (2+ years and a whole lot of drugs/procedures/anxiety), I'm just not sure what I want to do.

I hate the idea of not ever being pregnant again and never having another baby. But on the other hand I don't know if I can emotionally cope with infertility crap again AND be a good mama to Audrey.

This is making me insane. I've been super, duper emotional with every little milestone Audrey hits and I figured out that it's because I'm so terribly afraid that I will never experience any of this again. Sounds like I really want to give it a try, right? So why is it that when I think about getting pregnant again I want to vomit and I can actually feel my heartrate accelerate?

Ugh. Any magic answers out there? Anyone have any heartwarming stories about how much easier it was to conceive #2?


At 6/11/08, 3:17 PM , Anonymous Andria and Co. said...

Infertility through me for a loop. The miscarriages, the medicines, the procedures- it scarred me. Made me depressed. I want Blake to have a GREAT first year, so we are putting off until he is a year old. That way, I don't have to deal with bedrest and all that other stuff during his first year.
Of course, we may have an oopsie, cause right now, we are just relying on the "pull and pray" method.

At 6/12/08, 6:41 AM , Blogger Kate said...

No stories here, but we are planning to try again when Luke is one. I try not to think about it, yet, so I guess sticking my head in the sand is how I deal.

At 6/12/08, 9:51 AM , Blogger Larisa said...

Oh I'm doing the same thing. We do have 3 frozen embryos, but it took so, so much to get to Elodie, that it's hard to believe those would ever work. It's a hard decision, and it feels like time is working against us. Maybe you'll know when it's right. I'm hoping I will.

I do figure it can't be as hard emotionally the second time - I have Elodie. It won't be the same as wondering if I'll ever get to do all those things - I already have. And I can't get to the place emotionally I did before - I just can't because I have her.

At 6/12/08, 12:39 PM , Blogger Diana said...

Good luck, I don't look forward to this either.

At 6/13/08, 9:59 AM , Blogger Samantha said...

Well, you could look at Sky Girl at she become an urban legend of sorts getting pregnant with her second.

It's a tough choice. I've had my positive beta for all of one day and my husband said to me, "if we want another, we'll have to start trying again right away." Whoa there! One step a time!

At 6/14/08, 4:17 PM , Blogger PCOSMama said...

Well, it wasn't any easier to conceive the second time... actually a little harder for us, my pcos was worse.... but the big difference was knowing what is involved when we started treatments again and truly having reason to believe it will work... because it already had.

During the process, there were times that I would break down while home alone with my daughter (generally after a neg hpt). She caught me once in the bathroom, but she handled it like a champ... basically giving me a big hug and telling me it was ok. I think it was actually good for her to see that sometimes mama struggles with things too.

Honestly, you will know when and if you are ready to try again. And if you start the process and find it to be too overwhelming to do again, you can always pull out (hee hee).


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